Week 6: Goals

Today I wanted to mix it up a little bit. I had a 5 mile run scheduled, but I'd missed Monday's lifting session, so, given my time crunch, I mixed the two into a nice cross-training workout. Starting out at ROC, I made 1.5 laps around PRC stopping for a different activity. I alternated between 20 pushups, 50 crunches, and 20 squats. This turned into a great workout. The combination of strength and aerobic activity worked up a great sweat. Total time was 47 minutes. I made it through 3 cycles of the strength exercises. By the last one, my legs were a little sore, but feeling strong.

Somewhere around minute 20, I started to think about goals. I remember when I was in grad school, I was so set on finishing, graduating, finally "making it". Then, before I knew it, I was done. Looking up after my defense, I realized that I'd overcome some good challenges, but it hadn't really gotten any closer to where I wanted to be.

I don't know if I was really expecting to get a paycheck at the end of my defense, or if I thought there'd be one taped to the back of my diploma, but somehow it just felt odd to come all that way and not really be anywhere.

Maybe you can relate. I guess it's kind of like if you've ever driven by a house where the grass has grow up to the windows of the car parked in the front yard. If you grew up in Iowa, you know what I'm talking about. It seems like you always see that scene in front of houses with huge front yards. Every once in a while they'll get out the John Deer and spend an entire day cutting the grass.

Please don't take this the wrong way. Cutting the grass is nice. It's an accomplishment, but it doesn't change the fact that you've got a broken down Plymouth sitting on cinder blocks in the front yard. Focus. Good effort, wrong direction.

That's how I felt. At the time it didn't really bother me because there was still another step out there. It was time to get a J-O-B. In my mind, the degree wasn't an answer, it was just a prerequisite to success. After all, why would our entire society stress college so much unless it was the answer?

I'd always heard, "go to school, get good grades, get your degree, and get a good job." So, I did. A couple months later, I took a job at LSU. Check. Check. Check. Check. Now what? I went to work, collected my paycheck, dealt with the shock of taxes and fell into a routine. It was nice for the first few months, but something was missing. I couldn't shake the feeling that there had to be more to it than this.

Have you ever looked around where you work at the people who have been there a few years longer than you and wondered if that's where you'll be in a few short years? I did. I found myself staring right in the face of mediocrity and it terrified me.

I guess I was shooting at nothing and hitting it every time. I just didn't want to be average anymore. School, software, papers...I could spend the next 50 years doing the same thing over and over again and what would there be to show for it? I realized I'd put myself in a situation where I was never challenged to come alive. Benjamin Franklin was talking about me when he said, "Most men die at 25 and are buried at 75." Nature never stagnates. Either you're growing or you're dying. I wasn't growing.

Unfortunately all I'd know is what I'd been told. If one job wasn't working out for me, what else was there but another job? So that's what I did. Austin here I come. More money, different scenery, same results. I shot at nothing and hit it again. Thinking back, I suppose that the problem wasn't really the job. There's nothing wrong with a job. Everyone's gotta pay the bills, but if your the kind of person that aspires to do more in life, then it's pretty rare that a job will be the right vehicle to get you where you want to go.

I like the analogy of trying to get from New York to London on a bicycle. It won't matter who you are. You could be Lance Armstrong and it's still not going to happen. Having the right vehicle makes all the difference in getting to your goals.

I suppose that's why I'm so grateful to have found LTD. For me, and now my family, it's been a vehicle to get us where we want to go. More than that, it's been an educational system that reminds me to think, dream, and take action. It's given me opportunities to build friendships and develop relationships. It's helped me develop as a husband, a christian, a member of the community, and an employee. Through LTD I've learned skills that I've applied in every area of my life.

Shell's perfect. I'm not. I'm still growing and changing on a daily basis. I've learned to enjoy the journey and the struggle. I've learned that it's only through overcoming those struggles that I can earn my own self-respect. It's been a blessing and be sure that we're not done yet.