On race day, when we toe the line, we each have the opportunity to rewrite history and redefine the man or woman we see in the mirror. At some point everyone hurts. At some point the training was never enough. At some point we all have to tap into a deeper part of who we are just to keep moving forward.
Just words. Just thoughts. Just reflection of heart. Just echos of character that we use to define ourselves. On race day, we all claim some of these words for ourselves. What we come to realize is that the cost of claiming them is small, but the expense of living with them sometimes is more than we can handle. At the end of the day, the real question is "can we afford to live with the way we've defined ourselves?"
* * *
The day started out at 4am with me finding yet another reason to love my wife. Shell woke me up with plenty of time to get down to the race site. We picked up Paul Lopez and made it to the starting line around 6:40am. I've done a few races at this distance and above, but this was my first official half marathon. It turns out the Austin Marathon is quite a popular event. Over 11,000 people officially registered and finished the race this year. The start line stretched from the north side of the Congress Street bridget all the way up near the capital.
It was pretty cool seeing all those people out there chasing their dreams and the thousands of friends and family coming out to support them. What would the world be like if we were willing to support everyone who dared to dream like this group of strangers did today? What could we as a people accomplish if we were all willing to chase our dreams. I suppose that's why I love racing. It's just about the only time in life when you can get a group of people that large together who are all willing to say, "You can do it." "You have what it takes." "You may not have ever done anything like this before, so if your belief isn't strong enough to carry you right now, just follow me because I believe in myself and that will be enough to carry both of us long enough for you to believe in yourself again." It's a place where dreams are nurtured and grown and new dreams sprout up. It's the easiest place to do the hardest thing in anyone's life...escape mediocrity.
Before the race, Shell, Paul and I got a chance to mingle with the crowd.
All decked out in my stretchy pants and LSU hat. Thank goodness for the thermal cold weather gear I got for Christmas.
It takes all kinds to pull off a race of this size. Thank goodness you don't have to be a superman to finish the race!
Possibly the world's greatest race day wife. Shell thinks of everything and always makes it easy for me to focus on the race when it matters most. I don't know how I ever did it before her. She's truly amazing.
Paul and I taking in the excitement before the race. This guy can flat out run.
Just after 7am, the gun went off and the race began. 10-15 minutes after that I finally made it up to the start line. My goal was to finish averaging under 10 minute miles. I figured if I could hang with the 4 hour marathon group, I'd finish in around 2 hours, averaging just over 9 minute miles. I managed to catch up with the pace runners at the 1 mile mark by doing some creative roadside passing and drawing back on my experiences of lunch hour in downtown Chicago.
Ok, you got me. That's really the "Twist & Shout" scene from Ferris Buehler's Day Off. Cut me some slack here. I didn't take many pictures back then. You get the idea.
After catching up to the pace group, I managed to strike up some conversations with other people and take my mind off a pace that was just a little quicker than I was comfortable with. At the 5k mark I met John, a UT grad who walked away from the family business and now in his 30's, has made a career founding and developing successful startups. At the 10k mark I met Adam, a career salesman trying to move his family to Australia. Everything was going fine. I was on cruise control and feeling great. Then at the 10 mile marker the pace group keep going on the marathon route and the half marathon route broke off for a series of hill climbs leading to the finish. Now without a pace group, I had to pace myself.
I think it was around mile 11 that I realized that it was going to take a little more than I thought to finish the race like I had been picturing in my mind for the last 13 weeks. Sadly, that little more (eg food, gel packs, salt) was no where to be found. That's when I realized that the last couple miles were going to hurt...a lot.
Then a miracle occurred. Out of nowhere a fan appeared on the side of the road handing out oranges to her friends running by. "Here, you look like you could use one," she said to me. "Halelujah. God bless you lady. Thank you Jesus. I'm going to be ok," I said to myself. Fireworks went off in my mind. This was exactly what my body needed. Some sugar, some nutrients. Just enough to carry me to the finish.
Perhaps not. About a quarter mile later I stopped to throw up. There goes 12 ounce of water and yes, the entire orange too. Note to self. Don't mix acidic fruit with an empty, upset stomach. After the last of it came out I had to laugh at the irony. I thought having the orange in me would be just what I needed. It turned out, getting rid of the orange (and the rest of whatever was in there) was the real key. I felt so much better after that.
My hamstrings were still throbbing and I knew there were at least 2 long climbs left in front of me. 2 miles was an eternity away. There's no way I could have made it two miles. But I could make it to the next stop light. I could make it to the next traffic cone. I could make it to the next water station. Peak to peak. One foot in front of the other. 2 miles was Everest to me. All I had in me was one more step.
And that's how I finished the race. I took one more step over and over again. One foot in front of the other all the way to the finish line. When one step started to seem more than I could manage, I made a mantra out of Isiah 40:28-31 and 1 John 4:4. It worked. The last 400 meters were a blur. I felt no pain. I just kept running to the light at then end of the tunnel. When I got to the last 100 meters, the finish line was bigger than life.
As I crossed the finish line, I was in a daze. My body was numb and my mind still struggled to let go of its singular focus of the last 2 hours. On my right I heard Shell shouting, trying to catch my attention and snap pictures from the crowd. Even in a daze I'm overwhelmed by her love for me and mine for her. I kept walking, looking for an exit. Finally, frustrated and exhausted, I hopped the railing and found a place to sit down and catch my breath.
A few minutes later, Shell caught up with me. We grabbed Teddy and headed to the car. On the walk there she told me I'd done better than I thought. Evidently the finish line timer was running on Kenyan time. My time didn't actually start until I got to the start line about 10 minutes later. With all the challenges I had to overcome the last couple miles, I'd still managed to finish in under 2 hours. 1:58. A new personal best.
Back at the house, now with a chance to rest and reflect, I realize it's all true. I said it before and I'll say it again,
Perhaps not. About a quarter mile later I stopped to throw up. There goes 12 ounce of water and yes, the entire orange too. Note to self. Don't mix acidic fruit with an empty, upset stomach. After the last of it came out I had to laugh at the irony. I thought having the orange in me would be just what I needed. It turned out, getting rid of the orange (and the rest of whatever was in there) was the real key. I felt so much better after that.
My hamstrings were still throbbing and I knew there were at least 2 long climbs left in front of me. 2 miles was an eternity away. There's no way I could have made it two miles. But I could make it to the next stop light. I could make it to the next traffic cone. I could make it to the next water station. Peak to peak. One foot in front of the other. 2 miles was Everest to me. All I had in me was one more step.
And that's how I finished the race. I took one more step over and over again. One foot in front of the other all the way to the finish line. When one step started to seem more than I could manage, I made a mantra out of Isiah 40:28-31 and 1 John 4:4. It worked. The last 400 meters were a blur. I felt no pain. I just kept running to the light at then end of the tunnel. When I got to the last 100 meters, the finish line was bigger than life.
As I crossed the finish line, I was in a daze. My body was numb and my mind still struggled to let go of its singular focus of the last 2 hours. On my right I heard Shell shouting, trying to catch my attention and snap pictures from the crowd. Even in a daze I'm overwhelmed by her love for me and mine for her. I kept walking, looking for an exit. Finally, frustrated and exhausted, I hopped the railing and found a place to sit down and catch my breath.
A few minutes later, Shell caught up with me. We grabbed Teddy and headed to the car. On the walk there she told me I'd done better than I thought. Evidently the finish line timer was running on Kenyan time. My time didn't actually start until I got to the start line about 10 minutes later. With all the challenges I had to overcome the last couple miles, I'd still managed to finish in under 2 hours. 1:58. A new personal best.
Back at the house, now with a chance to rest and reflect, I realize it's all true. I said it before and I'll say it again,
“Dreams are good, but not good enough. Faith is good, but not good enough. Goals are good, but not good enough. There is only one way to prove your faith, dreams, and goals. Only one way to transform them into a reality, and that is the pursuit. The most important thing you can ever do in life is to find a dream worth chasing, and when you catch it, find a bigger one. Pursuit changes everything, it captivates your heart, increases your momentum, unleashes your focus, and brings astonishing results.”Shell, thank you so much for being willing to join me on the journey. You truly are a woman among girls. I love you and couldn't do it without you. To everyone else reading this blog, I pray that you have the courage to chase your dreams, whatever they be. I believe in you more than you can possibly know.
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